Do you ever have those moments of feeling that you might just not be cut out to be a mother or everyone else seems to have this parenthood thing figured out but you?
This past week I've been having those moments. (Please tell me I'm not the only one!) I've even questioned how I'm going to handle having three when, lately, my first two seem too much to wrangle.
I often wonder how many of us moms feel this way. Questioning our competency, comparing ourselves to other mothers we see in the outside world and trying to hold everything together while carefully teetering between keeping a balance to the scales or slipping and seeing everything fall to the floor.
I don't think anyone can appreciate how hard parenting is until they experience it first hand. Parenting continues to teach me lessons that I never could have learned from even the best of Ivy League schools.
No matter how frustrated some moments or days become, I know that it is my job to be the parent. It is my responsibility to set the example because my kids, after all, are fragile tiny souls that crave direction, boundaries and the need to know they are loved regardless of how they act.
And, just when I feel that I'm not up-to-par or I see someone else who obviously has it together because their kids seem to be perfect, the tide changes and I see the fruits of my parenting labor rise to the occasion.
Dave has been taking the kids to the museum a lot lately and Hunter is drawn to the media room. He enjoys getting on stage, throwing his hands up and announcing to all of the other kids what they will be doing for the next song.
I can't help but laugh because, YES! That's my son and he's gonna be a leader.
Although often defiant with me, those leadership skills are going to be what makes him say "no" when all of the other kids are saying yes.
I had just finished telling a friend that Emerson has a much shorter attention span than big brother and I often find it challenging to find activities to keep her interested.
When she woke up from a nap this week, I had an activity laid out that was intended for Hunter. Emerson showed an interest in it so I modeled how you used a spoon to move one marble at a time from the container to the cup.She played this activity for a rock solid hour.
Sister proved me wrong.
Anyone that knows me well knows that I'm an avid reader and especially of parenting books.
Although I garner a tremendous amount of information from these so-called experts in the world of parenting, I know that its just not so black-and-white.
Parenting, as with many other things in life, is gray. There are many days that we will question our ability in this role in life; however, there will also be days that we are confident we've got it all figured out.
Just like my girl knows she indeed does have a long attention span, its just Mommy who needs to get onboard with just what it is that makes her little girl tick.....Such as, wearing big girl pants and strutting her stuff because she is about to be two.
(Sissy "tap dancing" like Tilly in her favorite video.)The marble activity continued to play out long through the week but, as with most things in life, she eventually tired of it and moved on to something else.
It was a constant reminder that the role of parenthood is an ever-evolving process. Just as our kids continue to learn and change, so do we.
And, you know what? No one has it all figured out. Even the wisest of parents will tell you, if they're honest, that they made mistakes and lots of them.
But they'll also say that its through those mistakes that the best lessons were learned.
"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives you the test first,
the lesson afterwards."